We forget how far we’ve come in the journey of life; a conversation with myself.

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Your thoughts are your own. When they move in a direction that you don’t want them to, gently recognize that they drifted on an unwanted path, and bring them back into balance. Focus on what you want to think, and where your thinking is required. We need to think about our lives to make it better. We need to think before acting upon a certain decision. We need to think after we’ve overcome certain obstacles. We need to think all the time. However, what we think and why we think is the key to a happy, productive and evolving life.

My life is my own to live, and I have a right to make my own decisions and mistakes. Every aspect of my life is important. How I take care of myself to how I spend my money, these are my decisions to make. Small decisions have the same amount of power as big decisions. Choosing what to wear requires thinking, planning and decision-making. Taking up a career or a job requires thinking, planning and decision-making. Take those small decisions in life with determination. It will give you strength to make the bigger decisions in life with boldness and courage. Don’t feel bad when you do things for yourself. Only for yourself. While being useful for others will help you survive, but you need to value yourself first to be useful for anybody else. You owe it to yourself to value you, nourish you, love you.

What are the small decisions I made today?

  • I decided to create better emotional and physical boundaries
  • I decided to be more emphatic towards people as I understand that everyone is fighting their own battles and neither has to compared with one another
  • I decided to choose the career I want to be associated with and denying the one that is in the spotlight currently
  • I decided to wear clothes that project who I really am and not something that is trendy so that people will like it
  • I decided to make myself a priority by listening to what my body needs. It needs water, food, wave of fresh air and exercise to keep going.

Life is tough. It will challenge and test you. But you need to think how you can continually improve it. There are thousands of permutations and combinations that you can apply in your life to achieve success. Slow down a little bit and really think about all the things that matter. Because you will realise that there are very few things that really matter. The rest is noise in the background. Slowly, declutter the excess and feel your essence. Your soul wakes up everyday so that it can fulfill its purpose, don’t ignore its calling.

There are a lot of learnings in your journey of life. Don’t think about other people and depress yourself, think about all the qualities that you have. How can you use these same set of skills more efficiently? How can you evolve at a much faster rate? How can you understand yourself better so that you can achieve your goals?

I love evolving, and through my journey of transformation, I want others to realise their own. I want people to appreciate themselves and value themselves more. Not become egotistical about their qualities and talents, but to really understand what they’re good at. To help themselves to become what they truly came here to be.

The best way to begin is to trust your intuition.

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THE WORLD INSIDE OF ME

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Well, I always used to ponder over the question, how the world would be if it would be like the one which is inside of me? The free me inside can wear whatever she wants, and she does whatever she wants to do. A place where the happy me, the emotional me, the romantic me, the foodie me, the melodrama-queen me, the oh I am the most beautiful me, the bookworm me, the painter me, the actual free me, all live together.

Well, I always used to ponder over the question, how the world would be if it would be like the one which is inside of me? This thought amuses me a lot, why? Let me take you to a little tour.

My friends call me crazy, not because I am one but because I like to live on my terms. I have many parts of me living inside, they grapple, they wrangle, sometimes it’s like there is a world war going on, but still, it feels great to be lost inside of me, in the world of my imagination.

There was one time when I wanted to explore nature, wanted to be alone for some time, wanted to go on in search of myself at a place far away from this crowd. But asking parents and getting a yes for a solo trip before marriage being a girl is a big task. So all I was left with was one option, sit back on the couch, close my eyes and dream of the place I always wanted to be in.

And there, when I closed my eyes, someone whispering in a sweet melodious voice, with those invisible hands took me somewhere deep inside of me, to a place where I could live forever, a site so peaceful and calm.

After a few moments of relaxation, I was suddenly awakened by another voice, “Ye kya pehen rakha hai, itni choti dress?”, “Ye kaise bethi ho?” , “Itni raat ko bahar kyu ghoom rahi ho?” Again, this brought me back to the real world. Well, most of you girls must be familiar with comments like these. If you could relate, there is always a fear of roaming alone at night, of wearing short dresses, who knows when one will get eve-teased or chased by some creeps standing on the street, around the shops or on bus stands or railway stations.

At least my world has no space for this. The free me doesn’t have to live in fear or by societal rules in there. It’s not like she can’t live like that in the real world, but because somewhere she is restricted by her own family and relatives, she gets judged whenever she does something which is against their or society’s will. After all, society’s happiness is what really matters. Who cares what she thinks?

So, for me if talking to boys and wearing clothes of my choice means I have a bad character then I am happy in my world. If having opinions in this male-chauvinist world means I don’t respect men, then I am happy in my world. If getting judged for every single thing I say then I am happy in my world.

In my world, I am free as a bird with dreams in the eyes, ready for the flight. I can make my own decisions, away from all these bleak promises. I can do all the crazy things of my choice, sit whatever way I like, eat whatever way I want to, without any restriction. The free me inside can wear whatever she wants, and she does whatever she wants to do. A place where the happy me, the emotional me, the romantic me, the foodie me, the melodrama-queen me, the oh I am the most beautiful me, the bookworm me, the painter me, the actual free me, all live together.

Wouldn’t it be amazing to live in a world like that where everyone is freely expressing their own unique talents, everyone is working in harmony, everyone is expressing love?




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The World Inside of Me

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A lush green valley with HAPPY and successful corporate people enjoying sunsets (which, undoubtedly, is the most beautiful part of the day) every evening. A perfect world does exist (in my brain).

Well, this is who I am most of the days (read everyday), inventing a whole new world of oxymorons day in and day out. Women are called complex people for a reason, I guess. But complexity is an integral part of beauty. 

The beauty of a flower always subjugates the gentleness of simple leaves.

I am no different from the ladies making their mark out there. My brain is always finding new ways to fight patriarchy while being subordinated by the closest males in my lives. I want to stay away from all the beauty standards set by people since ages while at the same timr I'm eager to know what's new in the fashion industry. It's impossible for me to make a decision about the length of my hair when I visit a hair saloon. Just like any other person, I daydream of being productive while watching TV and using my mobile phone. I am the protagonist and the antagonist of my story (no other person can be).

Beliefs are what I am made of. They hold my scattered thoughts together. The minute my belief system sees me entering into a world of bizarre thoughts where I feel helpless, it immediately drives me homes to a safer place where everything might not be in the perfect place but I'd be grateful about my family, friends abd achievements (I believe, this is what life is about).

Whenever I see a "Mighty King" on the television infatuated by the sharpness of his sword, I always wonder what the other edge of it might hold. Maybe peace, tranquility and a lifetime of happiness. I forbid going to the extreme points because that is where the problem lies. And I never intend to be perfect but genuine. Trying to reach a middle ground is more of my thing.

Talking about extremities and excluding the digital world would not do justice to our beloved social media. Not a single person is a social media virgin now. We're all addicted to it. In fact, I am a fan of this digital world. And the one thing that I am in absolute love with these days is whatsapp status. One of my friends has "stars can't shine without darkness" as her status, which honestly is beautiful, but also a fact. So are we turning to facts these days to find our daily motivation? Are we comparing ourselves to the sstars of the universe or the legendary stars of our planet. I'll never find out. What I actually know is that our poor souls need a ray of hope to keep going. 

My thoughts are my only proof of my tiny presence in the vast world. Rational, raw, pure, anxious, whichever kind, I can proudly call them mine. They might distract me at times (to be honest, most of the time) but they're the most powerful gifts that I've ever received and I'll keep making my presence alive through them.

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